Skip to main content

Boaty's Weekend Wonderland

 


Some people say he's the messiah.

Some people say he's just a very naughty boy.

Regardless, Scott Boatwright, a man whose batting was (recently) so inept it prompted an appeal for leg byes to be donated to his tally, rose to the occasion at the weekend to lead Offley to two upset victories, one of which could keep the club in Division 7B. 

After all we wouldn't want to lose all the lucrative perks that come with playing at that exalted level.  

The stand-in skipper deployed his forces expertly on Saturday to mastermind a 54-run victory at Southgate that lifted Offley out of the relegation zone for the first time in months ahead of home game with basement boys Kings Langley. 

Offley's regular Sunday captain might have got a duck on Sunday (the Boat Aid appeal is evidently still in some need of donations) but thanks to the magical fingers of Rehaan Samdani and the batting brilliance (seriously) of Kaiz Ul-Haq, Offley stormed to a four-wicket win against promotion-challenging Langford to gain revenge for the recent 50 all out debacle.

Samdani's fingers blasted Langford into oblivion as he took 6-20 with a mixture of cunningly flighted deliveries that bamboozled the hapless batters as they capitulated for 134 with seven overs remaining after a strong start.

At one point Offley looked to be heading for defeat after Samdani fell for 37 (previous highest score 27) and the middle order powerhouse of Neale & Taylor proved as effective as the England opening partnership of Burns & Sibley. 

However, Offley were revived by a crucial partnership between muscle-bound maulers Mark Tattersall and Kaiz. 

Kaiz's response to receiving a pie is normally to put it in his pocket for later or slice it to backward point but on this day he dug in and hit four boundaries. 

Tattersall batted as Tattersall does, which is to say he hit six boundaries and didn't really bother with running.

Kaiz weighed in with a career-best 36* and Tattersall weighed in with 31. 

The pair actually weigh in at a combined 43 stone although people in glasshouses probably shouldn't throw stones.

All in all an excellent weekend for Offley, albeit a dire one for England with their latest test match fiasco.

Just think if you could harness the batting brilliance of Joe Root with the captaincy brain of Scott Boatwright....

And if you wanted to know what the outcome would be when you harnessed the captaincy brain of Joe Root with the batting brilliance of Scott Boatwright just watch this man in action some time....




Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Dotting Davis's Defiantly Dogged Determination Delays Dispiriting Defeat

  O SCC, 113-8, lost to MK Warriors, 171-8, by 58 runs Since the dawn of time man has sought to take on fresh challenges and scale new heights. Man has walked on the moon. Everest has been conquered. The 10-second barrier for the 100 metres has been shattered. Americans elected a massive orange twat as President.  Twice. Britain elected a gormless, unprincipled and spineless dipshit as Prime Minister.  So far only once but let's see where we are in another four years. Marc Ward won a game as captain. And yet as Sinead O'Connor might have put it, nothing compares 2 u, John Davis, on finally joining the Offley Double Figures Club (DFC) at just the 38th time of asking. Davis reeled off a breathtaking series of strokes as he scored a sublime 13 to lift his career average up to 2.378378378. Mysteriously and unfairly spurned as a bowler of late by a succession of captains, Davis has grabbed the opportunity to reinvent himself as a stoical middle order bastion of blockage. On a ...
1 comment
Read more

Ten Down; Seven Up

  OSCC, 24 (Twenty-four) all out, lost to Ampthill 28-3, by seven wickets Vietnam. You weren't there, man. You don't know! Across the United States grizzled veterans sit in bars and legion halls sipping Wild Turkey and Jack Daniel's and recount the horrors of the Tet Offensive, Khe Sanh and the fall of Saigon. Many years from now, the shattered remnant of Jamie Cummins' Dark Command may recall their trip to Ampthill with similar dread. It started well enough for the debutant captain who won the toss and elected to bat first on a good deck on a hot day. What happened over the next 11 overs was something that had not been seen in the 28 years of the club's sometimes illustrious and occasionally infamous history. This was infamy at its most infamous. With the club's all-time leading run scorer, Steve Bexfield, nowhere to be seen, absent either due to a miscommunication or because he was late as usual, saw the scorebaord from the road and thought sod this for a game...
1 comment
Read more

R Don Stiffs Offley

 OSCC, 133-4, lost to Flamstead, 136-5, by five wickets Less than twenty-four hours after Scott Boatwright came within a single blow of a maiden century and Offley's fielders dissolved in the rain by dropping eight catches out of ten, the sun set on another season in the semi-finals of the Hertfordshire Village Trophy. A team bearing little resemblance to the one that had qualified for the last four, one that had been ripped apart by anniversaries, weddings and holidays, produced a spirited performance with a lineup held together by children's prayers and angels' kisses, relying on the presence of the Great Samdani to add a little stardust to proceedings. Following a delayed start due to heavy overnight rain, Ben Wiles inevitably lost the toss and Offley were asked to bat first on a green pitch tinged with green. Richie Barker and Dan Goord opened the batting, reprising the 2024 final where they shared an epic stand of 1 and were both back in the hutch within two overs. Aft...
1 comment
Read more