Skip to main content

Boaty's Weekend Wonderland

 


Some people say he's the messiah.

Some people say he's just a very naughty boy.

Regardless, Scott Boatwright, a man whose batting was (recently) so inept it prompted an appeal for leg byes to be donated to his tally, rose to the occasion at the weekend to lead Offley to two upset victories, one of which could keep the club in Division 7B. 

After all we wouldn't want to lose all the lucrative perks that come with playing at that exalted level.  

The stand-in skipper deployed his forces expertly on Saturday to mastermind a 54-run victory at Southgate that lifted Offley out of the relegation zone for the first time in months ahead of home game with basement boys Kings Langley. 

Offley's regular Sunday captain might have got a duck on Sunday (the Boat Aid appeal is evidently still in some need of donations) but thanks to the magical fingers of Rehaan Samdani and the batting brilliance (seriously) of Kaiz Ul-Haq, Offley stormed to a four-wicket win against promotion-challenging Langford to gain revenge for the recent 50 all out debacle.

Samdani's fingers blasted Langford into oblivion as he took 6-20 with a mixture of cunningly flighted deliveries that bamboozled the hapless batters as they capitulated for 134 with seven overs remaining after a strong start.

At one point Offley looked to be heading for defeat after Samdani fell for 37 (previous highest score 27) and the middle order powerhouse of Neale & Taylor proved as effective as the England opening partnership of Burns & Sibley. 

However, Offley were revived by a crucial partnership between muscle-bound maulers Mark Tattersall and Kaiz. 

Kaiz's response to receiving a pie is normally to put it in his pocket for later or slice it to backward point but on this day he dug in and hit four boundaries. 

Tattersall batted as Tattersall does, which is to say he hit six boundaries and didn't really bother with running.

Kaiz weighed in with a career-best 36* and Tattersall weighed in with 31. 

The pair actually weigh in at a combined 43 stone although people in glasshouses probably shouldn't throw stones.

All in all an excellent weekend for Offley, albeit a dire one for England with their latest test match fiasco.

Just think if you could harness the batting brilliance of Joe Root with the captaincy brain of Scott Boatwright....

And if you wanted to know what the outcome would be when you harnessed the captaincy brain of Joe Root with the batting brilliance of Scott Boatwright just watch this man in action some time....




Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

BOAT AID

  It's not a secret. Everybody knows. League runs have been hard for Scott Boatwright to come by this season. Seven innings. 18 runs. Top score 6 (Before Dan ran him out - to be fair he did say he was going to get runs that day). Average 2.57. It's been hard going. But you can help. Because in 2021 it's not about orphans, or the homeless, or the starving, or about saving the rain forests. It's about Boat Aid. If everyone can find it in their hearts to pledge just one run to the cause we can really make a difference. Umpires - if the ball hits Boaty on the pads and the batsmen go through for a single, don't signal leg byes.  Give that run to Boat Aid. Scorers - if there's a bye or even a wide, don't be so quick to mark it down in the extras.  Can you not find a way to add it to Scott's tally to help him reach his goal of 100 league runs this season? Fellow batters - when batting with Boaty, can you not push for that second run to boost the Boat Aid total?

Player Profile #7: Josh Hook

  Cool. Calm. Collected. Not three words you generally associate with Offley's Mr Angry, Josh Hook. Well, maybe collected because he does like to be picked up whenever possible. The Boy With The Shit Tattoo came through the youth ranks under the expert tutelage of Darren Lunney and has been scoring runs for the Offley first team for over a decade.  Hook has now racked up over 6000 runs to rank fifth in the all-time standings and in a team littered with fading stars, has-beens and never-will-bes, he is invariably the candidate most likely to get to 20. Despite not owning a bat - something not generally associated with most leading batsmen - Hook's determination and idiosyncratic technique have helped him score four centuries - he is one of the club';s youngest-ever centurions alongside Mark Tattersall - while he has also added 30 half-centuries.  Hook currently has a timeshare arrangement with Lunney where he borrows his mentor's bat and holds him responsible for any fai

Player Profile #2: Mark Tattersall

  Once upon a time Mark Tattersall was young, reckless and mobile. These days he is older, wiser and more responsible and to be honest his mobility is of the kind customarily associated with scooters.  Over the years he has made the transformation from young tearaway to elder statesman and is now the chairman of Offley & Stopsley Cricket Club. Let that percolate for a moment; Mark Tattersall is our moral compass. Mark has also demonstrated a flair for organisation that has resulted in tours all around the world and is the brains behind the club's annual money spinner, the Offley Sixes. In a sense he has become the new Simon Warrington. That observation should impress him about as much as asking him to wear a Tottenham shirt. Just as at closing time at the bar he is invariably closing in on a double Jack Daniel's Honey, on the pitch he is closing in on the double of 5000 runs and 300 wickets. The youngest player in club history to score a century, Tattersall's batting re