The Trials of Wiles

 Milton Keynes Warriors, 215-9, beat OSCC, 69 all out, by 146 runs 

Hi.

Firstly, are you OK? 

It feels very strange indeed.

I imagine that you might have been feeling a lot like I have – shaken, troubled, let down, worried for the wellbeing of people on all sides of what’s been going on, and full of questions.

With aplogies to the poor, anguished soul that is Holly Willougby, Offley have far more important things to worry about than whether she can salvage her career and far more pressing questions to answer; namely as to whether Ben Wiles can rebound from his shocking start to the season and average double figures in the league.

Not since the traumatic days of Boat Aid has one batsman's form been such a cause for concern following Wiles's latest single-digit dismissal at Milton Keynes.

At first glance Wiles may appear to be riding high in the statistics with an average of 37.60 from eight innings.

However, once the friendlies are removed from the equation and the spotlight is turned on to his league form it makes rather grim reading.

Wiles's five trips to the crease in the Bedfordshire League have produced just 29 runs at 5.80 and left us full of questions.

Has the strain of carrying the batting order taken its toll on his back?

Is captaincy affecting his batting?

Has he finally been dragged down to our level?

Is he still shell-shocked by the LBW decision he received in the first league game of the season?

(Which poses the further question, is it all Wayne Cutts's fault?)

In fairness a vintage Wiles performance wouldn't have made much difference against Milton Keynes Warriors as Offley dropped another heartbreaker as they narrowly failed to chase down a steep target.

That made it three unsuccessful run chases out of three this year, games that have slipped away by the oh-so-tight margins of 117 runs, 208 runs and now 146 runs.

A man with no legs chasing Usain Bolt up a steep slope would get closer than we've done so far.

On a day where thunderstorms wracked the countryside, Offley's batsmen were blown away by another lightning bolt as they capitulated again.

The Warriors batted first and things actually began promisingly as Jamie Cummins struck with the second ball of the match.

After that things, if they did not exactly go pear-shaped, went a little wonky.

Normally when Extras is top score it means a team has been bundled out for about 85. 

Four Warriors scored at least 30 (including number 10 Nirmal Singh who hammered 38 from 18 balls) but Extras still prevailed with 42.

35 of these were wides. 

Peter Gilkes served up his customary dirty dozen, Kaiz Ul-Haq sent down a 13-ball over that featured six wides and a no ball (funnily enough he didn't get a second over) and even Darren Lunney, who wanders off the straight and narrow about as often as Luke Munt orders salad, accounted for seven wides.

James Barker was the pick of the bowlers as he took 3-21 and moved level with Cummins atop the wicket charts. Both players have now claimed nine wickets this season. 

With the score on 158-8 Offley had hopes of restricting the hosts to 170-odd (and thereby potentially getting within 100 of the target) before Nirmal took a liking to Lunney as the Geordie twirler conceded 49 runs in six overs.

Lunney's day didn't get much better as he was the first to fall during the reply for a second-ball duck.

It might have been Nirmal with the ball (he took 5-31) but it was normal for Offley with the bat.

If Offley were still in the game at 17-1 they were firmly out of it when they lost three wickets without adding to the total as the middle order once again disintegrated like a sand castle as the tide comes in.

Incidentally Wiles made 4 - in fairness only five players got more than that.

Barker top-scored with 17 on a day where only three batters reached double figures and just two faced more deliveries than Gilkes (14).

Seriously people, it's not fucking baseball. 

You're not just limited to three strikes.

If the Human Scythe can last 14 balls it shouldn't be beyond someone to perhaps build an innings and last at least 20 balls.

The upshot was that Offley were bundled out in just 94 balls.

Of the 64 runs that were scored off the bat, 54 came in boundaries, an impressively high percentage but further evidence that Offley's Spazball is not particularly effective.

Fuck knows what Stony Stratford have got to say about this result after last week but there's not a lot more to say.

Other than to compare our Beds League position with the snuff movie that is the Saracens League table and think that things could be a lot worse.....